It’s evil we are fighting… not a gender

There is so much talk in the media and on social pages around the treatment of women and how we as a society need to change in order to create better protection for us, against sexually related and or violent crimes.

I’ve seen high profile women using their platform in the media to speak out and call for this change.

I’ve also applauded and admired some Men on their stance regarding this and the impact they have on this message.

But calling for change in any situation regardless of what it is, your always met with a bunch of assholes against it and they find some reason to fault the message.

The inhuman and vile comments on a memorial page for a young woman who lost her life in a brutal sex attack and her body just dumped in a park is just not even comprehendible, yet social hysteria will always attract fuckwits who agree.

My view as a soon to be mother of two boys, is that you can teach your children all the respect in the world.. and trust me I have 4 sisters and was raised by a single mother – so my sons will be shown the value of respect and the importance of being kind, supportive and non violent( towards anyone, women paramount) but…

And I have no degree in psychology, this is just common sense and rational thinking

If you are capable of hurting another human being, female or male in such a way that you provoke fear and pain and show no remorse or empathy.. there is something not right with you.

We aren’t talking about off the cuff crimes like one punch here where there’s a possibility of a brain snap and you make the fatal mistake of a wrong decision.

If your praying on vulnerable people with a sadistic view of sexually assaulting them or even worse, there’s more at play and you’d assume mental illness or they have some form of a sick mind.

So a message directed at Men, how to treat women, education, campaigns on intolerance to violence all help yes.. I do feel they may paint men as predators to some and making us feel we need to be careful around them, when quite frankly any sick fuck is capable of doing bad things!

What I know is you can’t change someone’s mental state with a catchy slogan, if you are dark and twisted no emotion will be evoked by this.

What we do need is more support and funding in the mental health space, more education in schools, more facilities to cope with the growing numbers of people who present with some form of mental illness or possibility of.

Screening in schools if parents aren’t able to pick up signs, educate our teachers to look for behavioural warning signs and patterns and give them the power to refer onwards.

Employers watch out for signs in your staff, listen to your co workers, it takes a village.

We all need to take part if you want to see a real difference in society.

I will teach my boys if they see or hear their friends or anyone around them saying or doing anything that would make anyone feel uncomfortable or they found their treatment of them to be extreme or suspicious.. stand up and say something!

As a child something really disturbing and horrible happened to me, this man was just a sick twisted person who lived a normal life and had a family..

For anyone to attempt to or do anything like that is just sick in the head..

Again…. no catchy slogan was going to stop him

Perhaps a family friend or someone close enough may have seen signs of what he is capable of and could have spoken up and I may have been spared the fear of what he tried to do all those years ago!

No campaign of being vigilant with my safety as a woman would have saved me from that situation.

I was asleep on a mattress in a home where I felt I was safe..

I’m just trying to put out in conversation a different perspective..

It’s all well and good to be up in arms about the treatment of women and jump on the man bashing wagon and scream out for change.

As I said, every message and campaign had its merits but they aren’t solutions and in some cases have turned into aggressors.

I don’t want my boys to feel that burden, especially when raised to be good men with strong values by a mother that always stands behind empowering women.

What I do want is them to have enough support in society to be backed up when they pull others up on their behaviour.. I want this to be the new normal, that we stand together in society, in our local communities and actually do something not just throw words around.

1 life lost is way too many! How about all the lives not being lived and the damage it’s caused other women who survived sexual and domestic violence against them.

How do we fix their scars? How do we help them move on with their lives?

It’s a multi layered very complex topic that has divided people, brought out trolls and extreme views.

We need education, more focus on mental health and screening, more thought out campaigns and better resources and support for victims.

We shouldn’t be generalising and putting this all back on men, that’s the easy path to take.. we need to work together!

Everyone should feel safe, no one should be expected to take any measures that others wouldn’t just to survive a day…

But the reality is we live in a world where there are sub cultured scum that lurk in the shadows and we all need to be cautious and look out for each other and these bastards aren’t only men!!

When we finally realise it’s pure evil we are fighting against and not a gender, we will start making progress!

If you need help, if your worried about someone or are in a situation where you feel unsafe.. you need to speak up.

Mission Australia is amazing in helping victims of domestic violence and can be reached on 1800 RESPECT

Lifeline 131114 for support if you are feeling depressed and need help

Or the Police for anything else that makes you feel unsafe.

Women need to know they are supported and there is help available.

My thoughts and love to the victims and their families on the recent sickening crimes.